One year on...

Hello!

Well it's been almost a year since I came off Roaccutane, and I thought it would be worth doing another post about how life has been since I came off it.

In terms of my skin, I think I've been pretty damn lucky, as I am very happy with the state it's in these days! Yes, I was gutted to come off it after only 3 months, and yes, I do still get the occasional outbreak but it is nothing like it used to be, and I'm confident that it won't resort back to that. I have good skin days, and bad skin days, as you can see below.

Good skin day (surprisingly not edited!)

Bad skin day (and bad photo!)

In terms of the issues I had with digestion, the symptoms wore off once I came off Roaccutane, but came back a few months later, before going away again. After a long time of the problems going and coming back, I recently had a bout where it was very regular, and my GP soon referred me to a gastroenterologist. Just two days ago I went for a 'procedure' at the hospital (I'm desperately trying not to go into too much detail as it's pretty gross stuff!) and have been told that I have something called 'proctitis', which is essentially colitis in a smaller area. Thankfully, no more tests or procedures are needed at this point, and I have been given tablets to sort it out. Here's hoping that'll be the end of that!

Did I develop colitis from Roaccutane? I'm not sure. After researching a little online about how it can be developed, one possibility was overuse of antibiotics - and as many of you will know, a GP will prescribe many antibiotics before you are referred to a dermatologist, and it is a possibility that this was the cause for me. Perhaps Roaccutane did then make it worse...who knows.

The most important question is, do I regret taking Roaccutane? If it was the cause, do I wish I'd never taken it? The answer is absolutely not. What has happened to me recently has been truly horrific and something I wish never to relive again, but my confidence and happiness has increased SO much from having clearer skin, I finally see photos of myself and don't see the spots first. I don't feel self-conscious talking to people because I'm worried they're thinking "She's really spotty...". Some people may think me foolish or naive for thinking that way, but all I know is how I feel within my own skin, and I finally feel comfortable. It's been a challenging year, but I'm on the mend, so things are looking up :)

The advice I'd give to others considering Roaccutane, is simply to make sure your dermatologist is fully aware of all of your family history. I was asked about historical problems in the family, and anything I have had previously, but I wasn't asked specifically about siblings and direct family issues, and as my brother also has an IBD, it should've been mentioned right at the beginning. Maybe it was my own fault for not bringing it up, but when you have acne and you want to get rid of it, you'd do anything to do so. In hindsight, very foolish. Don't make the same mistake!

Good luck to anyone out there who's going for it. I would still recommend Roaccutane any day of the week, just be mindful of what it can put your body through.

Louise x

The end is nigh.

Hi everyone,

I've been avoiding writing this post for almost two weeks now, as I'm finding it hard to come to terms with it let alone write it! But here goes.

I went for an emergency appointment with my dermatologist last Tuesday, as I discovered some unusual symptoms, mainly with regards to digestion. I was willing to brush it off and not worry about it, but thought it best to get it checked out.

As it turns out, I've been told to stop taking Roaccutane :( I'm absolutely gutted, as it was working so well and I was so positive about the effects it was having! It turns out, because my brother has Crohns disease, and we have a history of other stomach problems in the family, it would be safest to stop, as it could cause inflammatory problems.

So I cried my eyes out for a couple of hours and have been prescribed a cream alternative - Adapalene. My amazing friend also went on a beauty-spree for me (as I'm pretty clueless about this kind of thing) and got me the ideal skincare regime for someone in my position (still very sensitive from Roaccutane, but don't want to flare up!). So far, the skincare routine is going very well, as the skin on my face has been about the same as it was before I came off - with one or two new spots appearing. However, I've been getting some new ones on my back and chest again. So hopefully they'll just go away on their own, otherwise it looks like it's back to the drawing board!

So it looks like 'Life on Roaccutane' doesn't make much sense anymore! May have to change the title, or just continue writing about my ongoing acne battle on here...hopefully there won't be any need to!

Hope anyone else on Roaccutane doesn't meet these problems, especially once you've got into the routine and start to notice a difference - it's a cruel twist of fate that I have to stop once it makes a difference..but there we go.

Good luck to you all!
Louise x

The new 'normal'

Hi!

I haven't written a post in ages, mainly because I've been so busy with work and have been spending my weekends enjoying the sunshine when it peeks out from behind the clouds..!

It seems my skin has settled into a Roaccutane routine. For the first month it went through a phase of extremely dry lips, nose, hands, everything, and then suddenly one day I woke up and my hands were completely smooth, my nose was back to normal, by lips weren't cracked anymore... it was very weird.

It seems this has become a bit of a routine, but perhaps on a smaller scale. Now, it seems to change from week to week. The cycle seems to begin with rashy hands - they're very dry but very inflamed - any type of moisturiser would make it go red, bumpy and generally very unhappy. A few days after that, it tends to calm down - it will still be very dry, but I can actually put some moisturiser on it - which is helpful! I am thinking of investing in some very mild body scrub though, as the moisturiser can't do much when there's lots of dead skin on my hands...lovely I know.
Then once this dry stage has finished, it'll suddenly clear up, and be smooth again! And then back to the beginning...

My face, however, seems to work the other way round. When my hands are very dry and scaly, the skin on my face is clear. When my hands are smooth, my skin breaks out. I think it's because of the science behind the pill itself - it's designed to remove all excess moisture from your skin so that spots aren't produced - which makes sense when there's more oil and my hands are smooth, yet my face breaks out.

Other than that, I wouldn't say I have any new symptoms! I went for my first check-up and she said that it seems like it's going well, and I'll continue going as I am (40mg a day). I've had a couple of nosebleeds, but nothing too severe - it tends to be just when I blow my nose rather than out of nowhere! I've also started to get very dry skin on my arms - I'm prone to eczema on my arms, so this didn't come as a huge surprise, and it's not quite as bad as my hands get!

That's all for today - no time to upload any photos yet, so I will add more in due course!

Louise :)

Week 3

Hi!

So I've reached the end of week three, and quite a lot has changed for me with Roaccutane symptoms. The beginning of the week was generally the same as before, with symptoms such as:
- dry lips
- dry hands
- outbreak of spots on forehead and jawline

I also had different symptoms:
- dry skin on inside of nose - which resulted in a nosebleed!
- flaky skin on arms and legs

So generally it was all the same for the entire week, however, just a couple of days ago I woke up and the skin on my hands was completely clear and smooth! It's crazy how quick it changed, and I can't stop feeling my hands haha! As well as that, the skin on my face has also cleared up dramatically - I still have some on my chest and jawline but the forehead is basically clear!

     

 
So generally, things are looking up! Feeling very positive this week, and it's nearly time to go back to the dermatologist for my first check-up :)
Keeping the faith! I'll be back in another week!

Louise x

Weekend break

Hi!

So I went away for a short break to Windsor with my boyfriend and his parents, and had a lovely time :) however, over the weekend I had a couple of things that were bothering me symptom-wise.

Firstly, on Friday night, I went out with my closest friends, and found myself feeling really low at the beginning of the evening - I had that feeling in my chest that you get when something has gone wrong? Well nothing was wrong, so I knew it was Roaccutane...
Anyway I told my friends about it (I was with my best who was the one who recommended it to me) and they were really understanding and wonderful :) then they managed to turn it around and I had a fantastic evening and felt great by the end of it!

I also had the same thing in Windsor - I didn't feel down the whole time because of my wonderful boyfriend making me laugh the whole time :) I'm a very lucky lady.
It's surprising that I was so high-spirited when you have hands like mine at the moment... the photo below will help you understand this...! The dryness has got pretty bad, but the sensitivity is what was the worst - I applied my Clinique hand cream, and Elizabeth Arden 8-hour hand cream (on different occasions) and both of them left my hands extremely inflamed, it almost started to look like a rash!

This isn't even it at its worst, and it's been burning all weekend. Now that I'm home and I have all of my products to choose from, I've slapped on some Sudocrem and it seems to be feeling okay - feels quite thick and sticky, but anyone who has used Sudocrem before will know that that's normal!
It seems to be calming the redness and burning, but not helping the dryness...I'll have to keep searching for the perfect hand cream!! I've also noticed rashes up my arms as well, which I assume is also related to Roaccutane, and not just random rashes!

Anyway :) better unpack!
Louise x

2 weeks in...

Hi!

So I've reached (and passed) the 2-week mark, and a few more symptoms have been creeping in:
- Dry skin on face - starting to flake more now
- Dry hands - appears very scaly, even after applying copious amounts of hand cream!
- Dry lips - again, applying something every half hour or so.
- Dry and flaky scalp, which is bloody annoying cus it looks terrible! I've been using anti-dandruff shampoo but it doesn't seem to be helping :(
- Dry eyes - I've been struggling a bit with this at work (as my job involves a great deal of reading), and find I feel very tired at the end of the day.
- Moodiness - yes, unfortunately, I've noticed I've been a bit more snappy than usual.

My skin on my chest has worsened again, but it's known to get better, then worse, then better again, then worse again - and like I've said before, I'm pretty used to that!

That's all for today - I have far too much to do and so little time these days!
:)

Louise x

Unlucky for some... Day 13

Hi there!

Well it's Day 13 now, and I wouldn't say anything has changed hugely from Day 10 when I last posted. My skin is just as bad as it was before I went on Roaccutane, except I have added symptoms from the pill itself. As my dermatologist said, the first month is all about the symptoms with no benefits...

Symptoms on Day 13:
- New spots appearing
- Very dry skin on hands
- Dry lips (need to apply lip balm every 20 minutes or so)
- Skin on face feels very tight, but once moisturiser is applied it appears oily
- Skin on face also peels and is quite flakey around spots themselves
- Spots on chest appear to be drying out and healing up slightly
- Red inflamed skin - looks like sunburn
- Skin feels very smooth and clear on cheeks! Hoorah!

Day 13

To be honest, none of these symptoms are anything I'm finding too unusual anymore. The thing with Roaccutane is that it is quite a serious drug, when you think too hard about it and what it's doing to your body. But the side effects themselves have been nothing too terrible so far - I may be getting new spots but by now I'm well used to the annoyance of new spots appearing - and all the other symptoms are clearly steps in the right direction. Finding my skin incredibly dry isn't cause for worry as that's what the pills are supposed to be doing! So generally I'm pretty positive :)

New spots appearing by ears and neck.

I did have a bit of a weird moment yesterday (Day 12) when I went food shopping with my mum. I was absolutely fine the whole time, when near the end I started to notice a lot of people were peering at my face in a strange way. Now, at first I thought I was just being paranoid, and most of you reading this will think I was being paranoid too, but every time I walked into a different aisle, someone would look closely at my face. It was quite strange...

Anyway, I went up to my mum and asked if my face was doing something weird, like all the skin was peeling off or it was rashy or something, and she said nothing seemed unusual, just a little red like sunburn. Or as my mum said "They're just looking at you because you're so beautiful!"...I'm more inclined to believe they thought I was sunburnt!

The classic dry vs oily battle... bizarre!

I thought it would be useful to include this photo, as it shows how much of a conflict my skin is going through - as you can see there are new whiteheads on the chin, but the lips and just above, the skin is extremely dry. It's hard to know whether to slap on the moisturiser or let it be! I've decided, for the time being, to only moisturise after I wash my face, as it feels tightest then anyway. My skin feels quite tight a lot of the time, but not so bad that I feel I have to put something on it!

Update on products I've been using:
Face wash: Simple Refreshing Facial Wash
Body wash: Dead Sea Salt Magik Bath and Shower Gel
Day moisturiser: Body Shop Aloe Soothing Moisture Lotion SPF 15
Evening moisturiser: Elizabeth Arden 8-hour Cream Skin Protectant
Lip balm: Nivea Soothe + Protect SPF 12
Hand cream:  Elizabeth Arden 8-hour Hand cream

Overall, I feel like I've got things covered for the time being. I have also been using Simple wipes to get rid of eye make-up, but I might have to reconsider this - I usually wipe off my make-up and then wipe my whole face, but it seems to aggravate it at the moment! Something to consider...

Anyway! Off to finish my weekend :) think spot-free, people!

Louise x